Hello, I am a marital therapist, communications trainer and author. I have thirty-five years helping couples and individuals make better relationships. I have written twenty-plus self-help books which include the international best-sellers ‘I love you but I’m not in love with you’ and ‘How can I ever trust you again?’ My books have been translated into twenty languages. I trained with RELATE the UK’s largest counselling charity. Perhaps it has been turning sixty but I have become interested in spiritual as well as psychological questions. Who am I? What are my values – as opposed to my parents, my teachers and the wider society? What makes my life meaningful? What do I believe about life, the universe and everything? Although my clients might come to me because of destructive arguments, falling out of love and infidelity, they are also interested in having more meaningful relationships and a more meaningful life. So what is the meaningful life? Why do we so easily lose our way and get lost in depression, anxiety, doubt, addictions and obsessions: the swamplands of the soul? One thing I know for sure is that there is not one answer. Each of us has to find out for ourselves what makes our life meaningful. But we can learn from each other, share our experiences of how to navigate the journey, how to endure and learn from the swamp, and finally how to find solid ground. I have decided to use my original training in radio and journalism to interview witnesses for what makes life meaningful. Each week, I invite someone who is a therapist, academic, self-help coach or who has an enlightening personal story to share their knowledge or experiences. I hope our discussions will help you discover what makes your life meaningful and find more purpose and contentment.
Monday Feb 28, 2022
Monday Feb 28, 2022
Monday Feb 28, 2022
“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation” (Henry Thoreau).
Therapist Simon Roe has based his life’s work on helping men live an authentic life. After himself going through a period of quiet desperation in his mid-thirties, Simon went on to help men break the silence, find “the song inside” and overcome their experiences of depression, violence and loneliness.
Simon has also worked extensively with boys and their fathers to create rites of passage that can help boys claim a strong, authentic sense of their developing manhood.
Simon Roe originally trained as a body psychotherapist, and is also a co-leader of the Mandorla Men’s Rites of Passage programme. He has worked extensively with perpetrators of domestic violence, and is a Respect approved trainer and supervisor. Simon has completed a foundation course in Process Oriented Psychology.
Simon and Andrew also discuss the idea of answering “the call to adventure”, an idea powerfully captured in this poem by Rainer Maria Rilke:
Sometimes A Man Stands Up During Supper
Sometimes a man stands up during supper
and walks outdoors, and keeps on walking,
because of a church that stands somewhere in the East.
And his children say blessings on him as if he were dead.
And another man, who remains inside his own house,
dies there, inside the dishes and in the glasses,
so that his children have to go far out into the world
toward that same church , which he forgot.
I'll be attending a workshop on masculinity in times of change and crisis with Simon Roe & his colleague William Ayot in Feb/Mar 2023. I'd love you to join us. Details are here
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Visit Simon Roe’s website
Learn about the Kingfisher Project, a community dedicated to rites of passage for boys aged 13-16.
Get Andrew’s advice on creating real change in your life and relationships in his book Wake Up and Change Your Life: How to Survive a Crisis and Be Stronger, Wiser and Happier
Read Andrew’s thoughts on what to do if you or your partner feel like you’re in the throes of what society would call a midlife crisis